Cyrano.AI
Ellie took a seat at the corner of the coffee shop. The aroma of artisan coffee was only growing her anxiety. When he had suggested the Paradox Roast, she quickly agreed. The trend coffee shop sat in the heart of the buzzing campus at Michigan State.
She drummed her fingers frantically on the tabletop, waiting for him to appear. This was a blind date. She didn’t know anything about him other than the conversation which she had read after the fact. All she could do was blame her well-meaning roommate and the new app she had downloaded, ‘Cyrano AI’.
“Breathe Ellie,” chirped an overly cordial voice directly in her ear. “Remember, I will be present during the date and will be analyzing his profile in real-time. Trust in the algorithm and you’ll be fine.”
Ellie nodded and put her hands down at her side. The unseen presence was disconcerting — having a voice in her head telling her what to do and say didn’t exactly make her feel good. Did it make sense to be nothing but a puppet when trying to find someone to love her earnestly?
Across the cafe, a man approached the woman sitting in the corner. He fidgeted with a fraying sleeve on his sweater while trying to muster up the courage to sit down.
“Ben, you need to act smooth,” his own Cyrano advised him quietly. “Open with a compliment. Be honest, not corny. The latest trends suggest woman find that off-putting. Compliment her eyes.”
“I like your eyes,” he blurted out.
Ellie turned around.
“Pardon?”
“Sorry. It’s Ben. From the blind date.”
“Oh, please sit down,” she offered.
“He’s clearly an amateur,” said the voice in her head. “He didn’t even see your face before saying that.”
The two sat down and were silent for a moment. The tension grew.
“Say something,” her AI prodded. “The analysis of his profile indicates he enjoys sci-fi. Maintain eye contact and reference something classic.”
“So, have you ever wished,” Ellie began, reciting the words, staring deep at his forehead. “that you had a sonic screwdriver you could use to escape awkward situations.”
Ben stared back, nonplussed. He nodded briefly, then scrunched his face into a smile. “Finally, someone who speaks my language! Would you rather be a 10th Doctor companion or would you prefer the adventures of Peter Capaldi?”
Ellie didn’t know. Who was this doctor? And who was Peter? Thankfully her AI came to the rescue, filling her in with just enough details to continue the conversation. Her Cyrano was in overdrive. *"Doctor Who" reference detected.* "Play along," it hissed. "Enthusiasm is key. He's into it."
The conversation veered wildly over the next hour. It was a bizarre conversational tango, repeating the whispered stage directions commanding them. Ellie learned about Ben’s obsession with retro arcade games. She had thought about telling him about her own passion for cycling, but the AI kept pushing the conversation in its own direction. All she could do was trust it.
As the date naturally drew to a close, an odd feeling settled over both of them. Although they shared a lot, and had a riveting conversation, the whole thing felt manufactured.
Ben felt he had shared more about himself than with any of his classmates. Yet did he actually enjoy spending this time with her?
“Ellie,” he stared, feeling a hesitancy in his voice. “Have you had a good time, or has something felt off?”
“Off?” Ellie echoed.
Ben looked away, feeling embarrassed. “Have you felt like there was some little voice whispering and telling you what to say?”
Ellie’s eyes suddenly grew wide. With trembling fingers, she reached up and removed her earpiece.
“Ben… you too?”
Silence hung in the air as Ben pulled out his own. This was a true silence, with the responsibility falling on them to say something.
“I think I actually prefer not knowing what a good first date question is supposed to be,” Ellie admitted.
“Same,” he agreed with a genuine smile. “Without Cyrano, your Dr. Who reference was terrible.”
“I don’t know what that is,” she giggled.
“The sonic screwdriver?”
“Oh, that’s what that is. I really had no idea.”
“I hardly know. My older brother watched it, but I’ve never sat down for a full episode.”
“So we both had a full conversation for an hour about a TV show neither of us watched?”
“That AI is definitely something.”
Both of them stepped out of the coffee shop onto the bright street.
“I guess our date has come to an end?” Ben asked.
“I think so,” Ellie nodded.
“Would you want to see me again?”
“I don’t think so. Despite what the algorithm said, I’m just not sure we’re a match.”
And then they parted ways, both finally feeling refreshed by honesty.
There are many new apps that bill themselves as AI boyfriends and girlfriends. You don’t need a real romantic partner, you just need to stay inside all day with this machine.
I don’t think that’s a good future, but one that may be seen as an easy alternative.
Cyrano is an old tale that has been adapted many times, about a man who helps a friend woo a woman using his words. If that was adapted to today, it could help many people be convincing conversationalists when on a date. But at the same time, would that actually bring romantic satisfaction?